Proud to be a 'Hoo

Another reason to be a proud University of Virginia graduate ;)

http://voices.washingtonpost.com/college-inc/2011/02/8_of_top_25_public_college_gra.html

Understanding Derivatives - A Primer

Received this forward in an email... gives a pretty good idea of what's really going on...

Heidi is the proprietor of a bar in Detroit.

She realizes that virtually all of her customers are unemployed alcoholics and, as such, can no longer afford to patronize her bar.

To solve this problem, she comes up with a new marketing plan that allows her customers to drink now, but pay later.

Heidi keeps track of the drinks consumed on a ledger (thereby granting the customers' loans).

Word gets around about Heidi's "drink now, pay later" marketing strategy and, as a result, increasing numbers of customers flood into Heidi's bar. Soon she has the largest sales volume for any bar in Detroit.

By providing her customers freedom from immediate payment demands, Heidi gets no resistance when, at regular intervals, she substantially increases her prices for wine and beer, the most consumed beverages.

Consequently, Heidi's gross sales volume increases massively.

A young and dynamic vice-president at the local bank recognizes that these customer debts constitute valuable future assets and increases Heidi's borrowing limit.

He sees no reason for any undue concern, since he has the debts of the unemployed alcoholics as collateral!!!

At the bank's corporate headquarters, expert traders figure a way to make huge commissions, and transform these customer loans into DRINK BONDS.

These "securities" then are bundled and traded on international securities markets.

Naive investors don't really understand that the securities being sold to them as "AAA Secured Bonds" really are debts of unemployed alcoholics. Nevertheless, the bond prices continuously climb!!!, and the securities soon become the hottest-selling items for some of the nation's leading brokerage houses.

One day, even though the bond prices still are climbing, a risk manager at the original local bank decides that the time has come to demand payment on the debts incurred by the drinkers at Heidi's bar. He so informs Heidi.

Heidi then demands payment from her alcoholic patrons, but being unemployed alcoholics they cannot pay back their drinking debts.

Since Heidi cannot fulfill her loan obligations she is forced into bankruptcy. The bar closes and Heidi's 11 employees lose their jobs.

Overnight, DRINK BOND prices drop by 90%.

The collapsed bond asset value destroys the bank's liquidity and prevents it from issuing new loans, thus freezing credit and economic activity in the community.

The suppliers of Heidi's bar had granted her generous payment extensions and had invested their firms' pension funds in the BOND securities.

They find they are now faced with having to write off her bad debt and with losing over 90% of the presumed value of the bonds.

Her wine supplier also claims bankruptcy, closing the doors on a family business that had endured for three generations, her beer supplier is taken over by a competitor, who immediately closes the local plant and lays off 150 workers..

Fortunately though, the bank, the brokerage houses and their respective executives are saved and bailed out by a multibillion dollar no-strings attached cash infusion from the government.

The funds required for this bailout are obtained by new taxes levied on employed, middle-class, nondrinkers who have never been in Heidi's bar.

Now do you understand?

Hilarious Photo Booth video

This made me laugh outloud... Love it...

http://www.wimp.com/photobooth

Hollywood Hills House

My husband sent me this article:
http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2011/02/16/hollywood-hills-mansion-haunted-cursed-definitely-sale/

Which led me here:
http://www.zillow.com/homedetails/2450-Solar-Dr-Los-Angeles-CA-90046/63081610_zpid/
Did you look at the pictures?!

Ok... the article also led me here:
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/02/16/us/16hollywood.html?pagewanted=2&_r=3&ref=global-home

Which then led me here: http://www.nicholscanyon.org/index.html
(That's the neighborhood's association website)

I then became curious and googled mapped the distance from this house to the Playboy Mansion (b/c I'm obsessed with the Original Girls Next Door)... about 8 miles, depending on which way you go, and approx 22 minutes...

This reminded me of what my blog was created for ;) Excellent google searches!

(Oh also? Timothy Devine? The current homeowner? not too interesting, I couldn't even find a wiki page for him... http://www.record-labels-companies-guide.com/interview-columbia-records.html )

History of Rap

I don't really know who Jimmy Fallon is, but he definitely held his own with this one... pretty good... made me smile :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o1yK6RYXMYQ&feature=related

I'm 63 and I'm tired...

Interesting Reading:

Robert A. Hall is the actor who plays the coroner on CSI if you watch that show. He also is a Marine Vietnam War veteran.

"I'm 63 and I'm Tired"
by Robert A. Hall

I'm 63. Except for one semester in college when jobs were scarce and a six-month period when I was between jobs, but job-hunting every day, I've worked hard since I was 18. Despite some health challenges, I still put in 50-hour weeks, and haven't called in sick in seven or eight years. I make a good salary, but I didn't inherit my job or my income, and I worked to get where I am. Given the economy, there's no retirement in sight, and I'm tired. Very tired.

I'm tired of being told that I have to "spread the wealth" to people who don't have my work ethic. I'm tired of being told the government will take the money I earned, by force if necessary, and give it to people too lazy to earn it.

I'm tired of being told that I have to pay more taxes to "keep people in their homes." Sure, if they lost their jobs or got sick, I'm willing to help. But if they bought Mc Mansions at three times the price of our paid-off, $250,000 condo, on one-third of my salary, then let the left-wing Congress-critters who passed Fannie and Freddie and the Community Reinvestment Act that created the bubble help them with their own money.

I'm tired of being told how bad America is by left-wing millionaires like Michael Moore, George Soros and Hollywood Entertainers who live in luxury because of the opportunities America offers. In thirty years, if they get their way, the United States will have the economy of Zimbabwe, the freedom of the press of China the crime and violence of Mexico , the tolerance for Christian people of Iran , and the freedom of speech of Venezuela .

I'm tired of being told that Islam is a "Religion of Peace," when every day I can read dozens of stories of Muslim men killing their sisters, wives and daughters for their family "honor"; of Muslims rioting over some slight offense; of Muslims murdering Christian and Jews because they aren't "believers"; of Muslims burning schools for girls; of Muslims stoning teenage rape victims to death for "adultery"; of Muslims mutilating the genitals of little girls; all in the name of Allah, because the Qur'an and Shari'a law tells them to.

I'm tired of being told that "race doesn't matter" in the post-racial world of Obama, when it's all that matters in affirmative action jobs, lower college admission and graduation standards for minorities (harming them the most), government contract set-asides, tolerance for the ghetto culture of violence and fatherless children that hurts minorities more than anyone, and in the appointment of U.S. Senators from Illinois.

I think it's very cool that we have a black president and that a black child is doing her homework at the desk where Lincoln wrote the Emancipation Proclamation. I just wish the black president was Condi Rice, or someone who believes more in freedom and the individual and less arrogantly of an all-knowing government.

I'm tired of being told that out of "tolerance for other cultures" we must let Saudi Arabia use our oil money to fund mosques and mandrassa Islamic schools to preach hate in America, while no American group is allowed to fund a church, synagogue or religious school in Saudi Arabia to teach love and tolerance.

I'm tired of being told I must lower my living standard to fight global warming, which no one is allowed to debate. My wife and I live in a two-bedroom apartment and carpool together five miles to our jobs. We also own a three-bedroom condo where our daughter and granddaughter live. Our carbon footprint is about 5% of Al Gore's, and if you're greener than Gore, you're green enough.

I'm tired of being told that drug addicts have a disease, and I must help support and treat them, and pay for the damage they do. Did a giant germ rush out of a dark alley, grab them, and stuff white powder up their noses while they tried to fight it off? I don't think Gay people choose to be Gay, but I #@*# sure think druggies chose to take drugs. And I'm tired of harassment from cool people treating me like a freak when I tell them I never tried marijuana.
I'm tired of illegal aliens being called "undocumented workers," especially the ones who aren't working, but are living on welfare or crime. What's next? Calling drug dealers, "Undocumented Pharmacists"? And, no, I'm not against Hispanics. Most of them are Catholic, and it's been a few hundred years since Catholics wanted to kill me for my religion.

I'm willing to fast track for citizenship any Hispanic person, who can speak English, doesn't have a criminal record and who is self-supporting without family on welfare, or who serves honorably for three years in our military.... Those are the citizens we need.

I'm tired of latte liberals and journalists, who would never wear the uniform of the Republic themselves, or let their entitlement-handicapped kids near a recruiting station, trashing our military. They and their kids can sit at home, never having to make split-second decisions under life and death circumstances, and bad mouth better people than themselves. Do bad things happen in war? You bet. Do our troops sometimes misbehave? Sure. Does this compare with the atrocities that were the policy of our enemies for the last fifty years and still are? Not even close.

So here's the deal. I'll let myself be subjected to all the humiliation and abuse that was heaped on terrorists at Abu Ghraib or Gitmo, and the critics can let themselves be subject to captivity by the Muslims, who tortured and beheaded Daniel Pearl in Pakistan, or the Muslims who tortured and murdered Marine Lt. Col. William Higgins in Lebanon, or the Muslims who ran the blood-spattered Al Qaeda torture rooms our troops found in Iraq, or the Muslims who cut off the heads of schoolgirls in Indonesia, because the girls were Christian.
Then we'll compare notes. British and American soldiers are the only troops in history that civilians came to for help and handouts, instead of hiding from in fear.

I'm tired of people telling me that their party has a corner on virtue and the other party has a corner on corruption. Read the papers; bums are bipartisan. And I'm tired of people telling me we need bipartisanship. I live in Illinois, where the “Illinois Combine" of Democrats has worked to loot the public for years. Not to mention the tax cheats in Obama's cabinet.

I'm tired of hearing wealthy athletes, entertainers and politicians of both parties talking about innocent mistakes, stupid mistakes or youthful mistakes, when we all know they think their only mistake was getting caught. I'm tired of people with a sense of entitlement, rich or poor.

Speaking of poor, I'm tired of hearing people with air-conditioned homes, color TVs and two cars called poor. The majority of Americans didn't have that in 1970, but we didn't know we were "poor." The poverty pimps have to keep changing the definition of poor to keep the dollars flowing.

I'm real tired of people who don’t take responsibility for their lives and actions. I'm tired of hearing them blame the government, or discrimination or big-whatever for their problems.

Yes, I'm tired. But I'm also glad to be 63. Because, mostly, I'm not going to have to see the world these people are making. I'm just sorry for my granddaughter.

Robert A. Hall is a Marine Vietnam veteran who served five terms in the Massachusetts State Senate.

Nothing says "I love you" like...

a giant cockroach...

http://www.foxnews.com/scitech/2011/02/10/giant-cockroach-valentine/

A friend of mine suggested a catchy slogan for the new gift idea:
"Your Love Is Impossible To Kill"

Progress on Arlington National Cemetery

Amazed to find out Arlington National Cemetery administration was so far behind the times, but happy to know plans are made to make changes... it's important to properly honor the men and women who have given their lives for our freedom..

http://warner.senate.gov/public/index.cfm?p=Blog&ContentRecord_id=58c30180-7d49-4be1-9c28-8bfc4220edf4

Letter emailed from Senator Warner's office:

I would like to share some very positive news on our continuing efforts to fix what’s broken at Arlington National Cemetery.

It was last June when many of us first heard about Arlington’s reliance on paper records and maps, and the systemic disorganization and shameful errors that inevitably resulted. I think all of us were especially shocked and appalled to learn about dozens of instances of misplaced or misidentified remains at the cemetery.

As an American, a Virginian, a member of the Senate and as the proud son of a World War II Marine veteran, I thought it was important to take action to try to correct these problems.

So last August, we announced a unique agreement with the Army. Several of our leading Northern Virginia technology companies assigned their brightest problem-solvers to work with the Army to honestly assess the back office disaster at Arlington, and recommend a responsible path forward.

We already knew that Arlington Cemetery officials were relying on hand-written files, paper maps and 3-by-5 index cards, which was an entirely inadequate system for responsibly tracking the 300,000 military heroes buried at Arlington and the 6,000 military funerals conducted there every year.

Senator Warner, with members of NVTC and representatives from Arlington National Cemetery,
announce the release of an assessment of problems at the Cemetery.

As a result of this assessment [pdf], we now know there were other disappointing management issues at the cemetery:

Arlington relied on a single fax machine and an inadequate telephone system, which created a difficult and frustrating bottleneck for thousands of families trying to send death certificates, service records, letters of confirmation and other important documents.

This continued reliance on pencil and paper records required families to produce duplicate documentation that in many cases already existed in the Pentagon or VA computer systems – but for some reason these computer networks were not linked.
Funeral urns containing the remains of our nation’s military heroes frequently were stored on top of file cabinets, in closets and on spare desks at Arlington for extended periods of time, labeled with a temporary, hand-written sticker, awaiting the arrival of the appropriate funeral and burial paperwork.

Arlington grave markers frequently arrived with misspelled names or other inaccurate information because hand-written records were illegible or incorrect.

Now, it is clear these management issues and workflow challenges existed at Arlington National Cemetery for years, even decades -- and they certainly won’t be solved overnight.

But this business plan prepared by members of the Northern Virginia Technology Council provides the Army with a clear roadmap to bring Arlington National Cemetery into the 21st Century digital age.

If implemented correctly, these recommendations will honor the sacrifice of those men and women who are buried at Arlington. This business plan also will go a long way towards restoring the faith and the confidence of those families who have entrusted the remains of their loved ones to Arlington.

An assessment of this quality and depth typically would cost a client hundreds of thousands of dollars, but it is important to note that these Virginia companies and NVTC provided this public service for free. I want to publicly thank them for this great example of corporate citizenship.

The Army already has replaced the management team at Arlington, and Army leaders say they have taken preliminary steps to address several of the problems identified in this report.

But let me be clear: my interest in fixing what’s broken at Arlington does not end today. I consider it my responsibility to stay focused on these issues, and to continue to press the Army to follow-up quickly and appropriately, so that we can put this disappointing chapter behind us.

Best,
Mark Warner

Super Bowl XLV

Maybe I'll become a diamond...

Did you know when you die, you can be cremated and have your ashes made into a diamond?

I think I want to be made into a blue diamond...

http://www.ashestodiamond.com/index.aspx


(Picture courtesy of www.ashestodiamond.com)




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Typos

Be thankful that when you make a typo -- 50 Million people don’t see it!!! Someone miss-keyed the code to launch the ad…

Customer Service Complaint Competition

Customer service complaint competition.

http://www.slate.com/id/2281833/


Here's one of my favs:


May 29, 2009

Wm. Wrigley Jr. Company
Peoria, IL

Dear Wrigley's,

As a loyal Extra® Peppermint sugarless gum chewer for the last 14 years, I am dismayed by two changes that have recently been made to the Extra® product line. The first, and less egregious, was the switch from off-white gum, to blue. Normally, a cosmetic change such as this would have little to no effect on my chewing gum purchasing preferences. However, it appears that the coloration has altered the flavor somewhat. I may be mistaken, but from my most recent package, it seems the taste does not last nearly as long as it once had. As early as last year I can recall recommending your Peppermint chewing gum to a good friend, lauding its long lasting flavor. Alas, I can no longer stand by that recommendation, as your recent changes to the makeup of the product have rendered it a shadow of its former self. The new blue concoction lasts only a fraction of the time, about an hour, if that, and dissolves quickly. I may be incorrect in saying that the chemistry of the gum has changed, it could very well be that my taste buds have simply aged, and that the gum has remained the same after all these years. I hope the latter is the case here.

The second, and much more objectionable alteration is the new packaging. The five stick multipack was the perfect size. They were readily available in bulk at the local supermarket, provided enough gum for myself and a few pieces given away during a normal day, and fit comfortably in a pocket with keys and chapstick. The new packaging scheme is, and I regret I must use such a harsh word, an abomination. At no time in my life have I ever needed 15 pieces of gum in one day, much less at one time. I have never been in a situation that has warranted me chewing nor distributing among friends, such an enormous quantity of chewing gum. The box is large, heavy, difficult to operate and an inconvenient shape. It is similar to carrying a second cell phone in a different pocket, which I assure you I have no intention of doing. Were I a female, a purse would provide ample space for this new larger sized container. Unfortunately, being a man, with pocket space at a premium, I simply do not have the capacity to be carrying around such an ungainly object, in addition to my regular compliment of keys, cell phone, wallet and chapstick. One may argue that a front shirt pocket is the perfect size and shape to carry gum of this dimension. Unfortunately, not all of my clothing has a front pocket, and on those days when I am without, I would prefer not to overload my already burgeoning pants with excessive accessories.

In conclusion, I would like to say this. I have encountered many people in my life who have been loyal and stalwart Extra® gum chewers. We have remained with Extra® through all the new trends, fancy packaging, upstart companies, and gimmicks. I would very much like to stay with Wrigley's and continue enjoying your once fine product, however, given the circumstances, it may be time for a change.

Very truly yours,

Benjamin D. Brooks

(Result: Brooks received a voucher for $1.46.)