The Reunion

So I said to him,  "Barack, I know Abe Lincoln, And you ain't Abe Lincoln..."

Obama  has made numerous attempts to quote Lincoln
  SO WHY DOESN'T OBAMA USE THIS FAMOUS LINCOLN QUOTE:


You cannot help the  poor by destroying the rich.
  You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong.
  You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift.
  You cannot lift the wage earner up by pulling the wage payer down.
  You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred.
  You cannot build character and courage by taking away
people's initiative and independence.
  You cannot help people permanently by doing for them, what they
could and should do for themselves.
... Abraham Lincoln

Holy Prostitutes

hilarious

A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway when he notices a sign out of the corner of his eye....It reads:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION
10 MILES....

He thinks this is a figment of his imagination and drives on without second thought....
Soon he sees another sign which reads:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION
5 MILES....

Suddenly he begins to realize that these signs are for real and drives past a third sign saying:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION
NEXT RIGHT....

His curiosity gets the best of him and he pulls into the drive. On the far side of the parking lot is a stone building with a small sign next to the door reading:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS....

He climbs the steps and rings the bell. The door is answered by a nun in a long black habit who asks, "What may we do for you my son?"

He answers, "I saw your signs along the highway and was interested in possibly doing business.."

"Very well my son. Please follow me."

He is led through many winding passages and is soon quite disoriented. The nun stops at a closed door and tells the man, "Please knock on this door."

He does so and another nun in a long habit, holding a tin cup answers the door.

This nun instructs, "Please place $100 in the cup then go through the large wooden door at the end of the hallway."

He puts $100 in the cup, eagerly trots down the hall and slips through the door pulling it shut behind him.

The door locks, and he finds himself back in the parking lot facing another sign:

GO IN PEACE.
YOU HAVE JUST BEEN SCREWED BY THE SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS.
SERVES YOU RIGHT, YOU SINNER....

Trump Explains Dumbo Care...

I can't verify that Donald Trump actually said this, but I love  it:

Let me get this straight…

We’re going to be “gifted” with a health care plan we are forced to purchase and fined if we don’t, which purportedly covers at least 30 million more people, without adding a single new doctor, but provides for 16,000 new IRS agents, written by a committee whose chairman says he doesn’t understand it, passed by a Congrass that didn’t read it but exempted themselves from it, and signed by a Dumbo President with funding administered by a treasury chief who didn’t pay his taxes, for which we’ll be we’ll be taxed four years before any benefits take effect, by a government which has already bankrupted Social Security and Medicare, all to be overseen by a surgeon general who is obese, and financed by a country that’s broke!  What could possibly go wrong?

.

whatshouldwecallme

Discovered this little gem of a website...  http://whatshouldwecallme.tumblr.com/

this one made me smile:  http://whatshouldwecallme.tumblr.com/post/22812493547/when-my-mom-tried-to-hang-out-with-my-friends-i




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presidential bios

Love this article... but it scares me...

Everyone knows presidents have larger-than-life size egos. It goes with the job. But changes on the official White House website reveal that we’ve never had a self-regarding narcissist quite like the Oval Office’s current occupant.

They also reveal a fatal flaw in the Obama presidency, which is bad news for the rest of us if Barack Obama wins a second term.

It seems the Obama team has been taking the website’s standard biographies of past presidents and inserting gratuitous references to our Beloved Leader.

That’s led to entries like, “On February 22, 1924 Calvin Coolidge became the first president to make a public radio address to the American people. President Obama became the first president to hold virtual gatherings and town halls using Twitter, Facebook, Google+, LinkedIn etc.” and “On August 14, 1935 President Roosevelt signed the Social Security Act. Today the Obama administration continues to protect senior and ensure Social Security will be there for future generations.”

The only recent president *not* to get the Obama treatment was Gerald Ford. It seems even Obama’s webmaster didn’t want to link his boss to a president best known for tripping over his own feet and pardoning Richard Nixon.

Let’s set aside the colossal ego of someone who treats his predecessors as mere precursors of himself. Indeed, it’s easy to think about how Obama could have extended the comparisons. Eg. “God created the world in six days. President Obama created his first White House jobs summit in just four.”

And set aside the drooling sycophancy of those dreamed up this scheme, and then carried it out.

What’s chilling is that a president who treats his office as nothing more than a prism for reflecting his own virtues, is never going to admit his own policies might be why we are experiencing the slowest economic recovery in modern history, persistent high unemployment, the collapse of respect for America around the world-–and why 70% of polled Americans say we’re on the wrong track.

It takes a strong president to admit a mistake and change course in midstream. Abraham Lincoln decided he couldn’t win the Civil War without renouncing his earlier promises not to interfere with the institution of slavery, and issued the Emancipation Proclamation.

Franklin D. Roosevelt realized that to arm this country in preparation for World War Two, he had to give up his instinctive dislike of capitalism and turn loose America’s businessmen to build his “arsenal of democracy.”

Harry Truman learned that his initially conciliatory approach to Stalin and the Soviet Union wasn’t working, and embraced a get-tough policy of containment instead.

George W. Bush was willing to scrap three years of failed strategy in Iraq, in order to give General David Petraeus a chance to launch his surge.

And even Bill Clinton, no slouch at self-preening, realized his left-leaning social policies including HilaryCare, were losers and moved to the center instead.

Don’t expect any such change if Obama gets re-elected in November. It’ll be more of the same failed policies, the same game of blaming George Bush and Republicans and the One Percent for everything that’s going wrong.

And if we don’t thank him for the wreckage he leaves behind, it’ll be our failing, not his.

The White House website will say so.

Historian Arthur Herman is a visiting scholar at AEI. He is the author of the just released "Freedom's Forge: How American Business Produced Victory in World War II" (Random House May 2012) and the Pulitzer Prize finalist book "Gandhi and Churchill: The Epic Rivalry That Destroyed an Empire and Forged Our Age" (Bantam, 2008).


Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2012/05/16/obama-fatal-flaw-revealed-in-white-house-website-presidential-bios/?intcmp=obnetwork#ixzz1wHzEWrFj

Male or Female?

Male or Female?   

You might not have known this, but a lot of non-living objects are actually either male or female.  Here are some examples:  

FREEZER BAGS: They are male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them. 

PHOTOCOPIERS: These are female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again. They are an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can also wreak havoc if you push the wrong Buttons.

TIRES: Tires are male, because they go bald easily and are often over inflated

HOT AIR BALLOONS: Also a male object, because to get them to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under their butt.

SPONGES: These are female, because they are soft, squeezable and retain water. 

 WEB PAGES: Female, because they're constantly being looked at and frequently getting hit on.

TRAINS: Definitely male, because they always use the same old lines for picking up people.

EGG TIMERS: Egg timers are female because, over time, all the weight shifts to the bottom.

HAMMERS: Male, because in the last 5000 years, they've hardly changed at all, and are occasionally handy to have around.

THE REMOTE CONTROL: Female. Ha! You probably thought it would be male, but consider this: It easily gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know which buttons to push, he just keeps trying.

Penguins

Penguins are cool... check out this one!

This 10-year-old King Penguin was rescued from a fisherman's line and refused to leave after he was healed. He was adopted by a family in a small town in Japan and became a beloved pet who has his own personal air-conditioned cold room. Lala is so smart - he walks to the fish store with his little backpack to shop for fresh fish every day.

http://www.flixxy.com/pet-penguin-goes-shopping.htm